I am beyond brokenhearted rn. How some people can treat their own children absolutely blows my mind!💔😤😠
It’s one thing to have a split or blended family, it’s another thing, entirely, to treat them like they don’t quite fit in.😠😡🤬 But, to intentionally exclude a child from his own family vacation to
Disney World! —-and then, let him in on the “secret” weeks afterward, boasting that the Disney trip had actually been a gift to his brother for his 11th b’day!😡😡😤😤🤬🤬 💔😥
My son was tearful as he told me this. The sadness he feels is amplified in my heart 10000×!
How could his OWN (only living, biological) grandma and grandpa choose to leave our son out?😢 We have 2 sons!!! Not 1! Two!
……And their father! 🤬🤬🤬 How could he be so unfair to his son??? I appalled, crushed, and pissed!!!
I will NEVER EVER understand how a parent or grandparent can play “favorites” like that! SMDH!!
Don’t they realize the damage they are causing to the child being left out??? These kids are HURTING inside! They are NOT stupid! They SEE the difference that is made between them and the “favorite” child(ren).
They notice the amount of gifts under the tree with their name on them. They notice who, all-of-a-sudden fell terribly ill, and can’t make it to their birthday party, yet the very next day, take Mary’s child to the McDonalds play-place for lunch!
They F-ING notice!!! THEY ARE NOT STUPID!!! We, their mothers, their advocates, their shoulder to cry on; are drying our own tears as were explaining to them how YOU DO love them, YOU’RE just “busy”,..again!😠
They start to feel as if they are not good enough, that they are not smart enough, that they are not worthy of your love…. They recant, over and over, what they could have possibly done wrong. SAD! SAD! SAD!😭
They also begin to blame themselves…. they think that maybe if they’d behaved better at the store with grandma, the ONE time she took them, she would come visit more.
Let me tell you something…..
I will NOT allow this bs to continue to emotionally damage my child! I refuse to lie for you to spare my children the heartache! I will gently and lovingly explain to them what a sorry person(people) you are.💩 I will help my child to rise above the heartache and promote emotional strength within him!💪🏼👍🏼👊🏻😒💖
I will teach my children the skills they need to protect their tender, innocent, loving hearts from people like you. I will not allow you to embed your unfair, selfish acts upon my sons happy, childhood memories. I will NEVER EVER, EVER let ANYONE make my child feel unworthy or ignored!‼
NO ONE with half-ass intentions deserves, the privilege, of a role in my childrens lives. It’s YOU who’ll miss out in the long run.🖤
STEP-UP OR STEP OUT, the choice is yours.
💔 Found this! 👇🏼👇🏼😥😢😥😭😭
2, yes 2 of those children are mine and his. It may not be so obvious who’s the very “favorite” here, BUT, it is ABSOLUTELY OBVIOUS that, my precious guy, is NOT. His (full-blood)brother is lying on the back of the couch.
This pic was taken on Christmas Day in 2017. 😢😢😢(at his dads parents home)💔💔
My baby…he looks so sad, while all the other grandchildren are beaming!!! IT’S CHRISTMAS DAY! He should be elated! But,… he’s NOT! 💔😡
This picture speaks volumes about the emotional turmoil “favoritism” causes!!!
IF you hug one of them,
Hug ALL of them.
If you miss one of them,
Miss ALL of them.
If you bake cookies with one of them,
Bake with ALL of them.
If you celebrate her/his birthday,
Celebrate ALL their birthdays.
If you “treat” one of them,
“Treat” ALL of them.
If you love one of them,
Love ALL OF THEM!❤💞
PLEASE QUIT PLAYING “FAVORITES”
Some genuine Flint history here!…
…I was looking for something else when I stumbled upon this!!!
I truly believe that my father played a part in building Flint, MI into the automobile mecca it became in the late 1960’s!
Not only my amazing “D”, but hundreds came to Flint looking to become a part of the growing automotive industry.
My dad started young and was determined not to, eventually, let “some 30 year old punk”, become his boss.
He got the education and training needed to acquire a position in the big city! aka: the D! Well, more like Warren, Mi…
…Regardless, he retired after about 30 yrs of service to GM, as a Senior tool and die design engineer. He even pioneered and patented the door handle assemblies that we’re used in the Buick models in the late 1980’s! (In the pic with the BIG BOSS, my D is receiving the first fruits of his labor)
He’d came from a very humble beginning in North Dakota, and, retired with a very comfortable life here in the Mitten! He and my step-mother spent their days traveling the world!
He was an avid golfer and had played the game on some of the most beautiful courses the US has to offer. He truly loved the game and he accomplished the ultimate…
A hole-in-one!🤫⛳👏🏼 126 yds with a 7 iron! (glass trophy pic)
He lived his life with an inspirational attitude. Always positive, yet logical with a no-nosense approach to everything.
Right-wing to the extreme, I NEVER EVER in my WHOLE LIFE saw him in anything but khakis and collared shirts. Business suits and a briefcase were the Monday-Friday attire.
He believed in helping those who helped themselves. He expected nothing less than a hard lesson from bad choices, and yet he never pointed a finger!
“Always do what’s expected AND a little bit more”.
He was always a presence in the room. His genuine, hard-working, character was something men today, should strive to emulate.
Chivalry lived strong in my father’s heart, as I, nor my step-mother, EVER touched ANY type of door handle! I once saw him remove his professionally tailored sport coat to shield a female strangers hair from getting mussed up from the rain on her way into a restaurant.
And on a funnier note…. my awesome dad even took the blame for a loud fart his wife let go, in the middle of a crowded group of tourists!
“Oops, excuse me, excuse me”, he quickly boasted, as not to embarrass her.
Who does that????
The American Dream WAS once alive and thriving here. My father’s life was a testament to that. GM served our family well, hate to see the dream die for others!
My D lost his battle with cancer just a few yrs ago, but to anyone who knew him, knew that regardless of his pain, if you asked him how he’s doing, his response was ALWAYS the same… “Nearly perfect”!
He passed away on his birthday in 2013. I suppose he didn’t want to keep us grieving any longer than necessary.
I feel honored to be his daughter! He was TRULY a great human being!
It is so nice to be able to focus on what I choose to, not what my mind wants to. My mind would like to be all over the place, but not today. Today I took the medicine that makes the ADD go away. Literally, for the next few hours, I get to be as ‘normal’ as any non-ADDer. That is the only reason I can write right now.
It is also so nice to actually engage in conversation with my husband. He can yap and yap and yap, and I will catch every word. Usually, I cannot focus long enough to chat, let alone, listen to my husbands looooong stories. Today is a good day for me. Enjoy yours!
Hi! My name is Kari Taber. This is the first blog I’ve ever written. My life has been such that I’ve heard ‘you should write a book’ more times than I can count. Hmmmm…. A book, no; a blog, yes! So, here they are , my issues, all typed up and ready for you […]
This is a response, to a reply on a Reddit post about ADHD, that I wrote…
Bless your heart, you have struggled long enough. I hear you, loud and clear, when you say that you are broke financially and emotionally. I completely understand about all the “what if’s”. I’m no different than you. At this very moment, I believe my bank account holds $1.76!! I am struggling to pay for real estate classes that start next week, and I have NO CLUE where the money is going to come from! I have such BIG HOPES AND DREAMS, am I going to GIVE UP, yet AGAIN, just because I can’t come up with 300 bucks???
… HELL NO!
NOT THIS TIME!!
But, in all actuality, it’s not about the money. It’s about the mindset. If you lack determination and drive, you will struggle. Most people, like us, just don’t have the drive. I sure didn’t! And I’m not even 100% sure if I’ve got it now, but I am NOT giving myself the option of giving up.
A couple of weeks ago, I did some serious soul searching. (I do this on a daily basis, lol, don’t we all!?) The conversation in my head began the same as it always does…” I suck, my life is going NOWHERE, I’m broke, something has to change, I can’t go on, this time will be different,…” I almost couldn’t even continue the conversation…… It was the SAME thing I’d been telling myself for years and I hadn’t listened to myself before, why should I now????
Here is where it gets real. Instead of talking to myself, I decided to take a good look at myself. I briefly glanced at my unproductive past, filled with dissapointments, failures, and damaged relationships. I, then, tried to focus on my future…..What future??? I could only see MORE failures ahead. I started thinking about the PEOPLE in my life that I had let down. My children, who at this time, had/have NO real role model in their lives to emulate. How on earth can I expect a positive, healthy, successful future for them, when I’m not living a successful life?? No wonder my family has alienated me!! Eventually, everyone, even my precious children, will have no use for me! What the hell do I have to offer anyone? I am of absolutely no use to anyone, I am seroiusly just taking up space. I AM, IN FACT, A FAILURE! I frantically began searching for a way out of this mess of a life I’d made and quickly realized there wasn’t one!! I WAS, for the first time, TERRIFIED!
Only my death will fix this, so I seriously contemplated suicide. I believed that if I wasn’t around, my precious children would be forced to live with people that would, hopefully, push them to be the BEST they can be!! I want that for them, they deserve that!
My mind was made up, I’m going to kill myself. But, I didn’t feel good about this decision. I knew I needed to die, I just didn’t want my kids to cry for me. 😥😟😭😭😭
And, in that moment, in some crazy twist-of-fate, something inside me snapped!!!
I CAN’T LEAVE THEM! I WON’T LEAVE THEM!
What the fuck am I thinking?? ADHD strikes again…telling me to give up, cant do this, failure! OH, NO ADHD! NOT TODAY!!
I changed my whole pattern of thinking. My whole pattern of thinking HAD TO CHANGE!!! I realized that the things i was doing in my life, up to this point, WERE NOT WORKING!!! So, I began doing the OPPOSITE of everything!! …
Aaaaand, guess what???
After my dx, I pretty much became an alcoholic! I was so relieved to finally know that I had a disorder, and that I wasn’t just a complete failure at life!! But I quickly spiralled into a depression bc I realized that my ADHD was never gonna go away, that I was never gonna be a productive part of society! That I was forever gonna be just a walking collection of symptoms!! That I was never gonna get that Bachelors degree, never gonna have a real career, never gonna get a fair shot at success bc I am NOT and NEVER gonna be “normal”!
Life is better now though! I embrace my ADHD dx. I have accepted the fact that I am a hunter in a gatherers world. Learned to love myself, just as I am.❤. After all, what other choice do we have??
If you go to a psychiatrist with true ADHD symptoms, a diagnosis should come within minutes. It should only take a professional mere moments to distinguish ADHD behaviors from those just being lazy or drug seeking. I’ve heard, in some places, it takes MONTHS for a diagnosis! WHAT!!! MONTHS!!! That’s crazy! What the hell kind of ADHD assessment takes months? If you are struggling and awaiting a diagnosis, I am truly sorry for your situation. I was diagnosed in minutes and on meds the SAME DAY!! truly life changing.
The one thing I can say that I truly hate about my ADD is my total inability to be consistent. I start off like a firecracker then fizzle out just as fast. With everything! I can’t stand it! I’ll be so productive for a few days or so then, PFFFTTT! I’m done, not interested anymore, on to something else. The one thing that I really am trying to be is consistent with this blog and my writing. Tough stuff. Especially when you really just don’t have it in you to write. Usually, though, if I start typing, I’ll get on a roll, and before I know it, I’ve cranked out a post. Kinda like this one. Thank you for putting up with my mundane babblings, readers, cause you never know when a stroke of brilliance will emerge. Um, not today. God Bless & Much Love
I HAVE to share this with you… it is so powerful! Keep in mind, I did NOT write this! It was beautifully written by Rachael Simmon. As a person with ADHD, I’m also the mother of 3 children with ADHD, and this couldn’t be more perfectly stated….
I sit here alone, as I often do, Looking through pictures, pictures of you,
I think of the good times as a family we’ve had,
But, lately, they seem far outweighed by the bad.
I know you’re unhappy and it makes my heart ache.
If wishes came true, then your place I’d take.
Your head is filled with anger. Your heart is full of pain.
For you, I am fighting, but I’m feeling the strain.
I’m not always patient. Sometimes I get mad.
I scream and I shout, and Lord, I feel bad.
‘Cause the last thing you need is more anger and hate.
Cause you’ve had plenty of that in your life to date.
No one knows of the loneliness or the tears that are shed.
They don’t care how you’re feeling, or whats going on in your head.
They see a boy naughty, what a pain you can be.
They should try living with ADHD.
This morning “you hate me.” I’m sure that you don’t.
“I’ll hate you forever.” I’m sure that you won’t.
Whatever you say, and whatever you do, the fact will remain, that I’ll always love you.
I pray for you daily. I cry for you too. I cry for my child to no longer be blue.
So if there is a God, and he’s listening to me,
Please try lessening the heartache of ADHD.