My Unrelenting ADD Ocean

ADD rarely travels alone; especially if it’s undiagnosed until adulthood.  My breaking point was an anxiety attack that I experienced in my late 20’s. Panicked about what was happening to me, I immediately went to see my physician. After a few weeks of testing, I was a confirmed ADDer; with anxiety and depression. Lucky me, a 3 for 1 diagnosis.
My life hasn’t been easy, not that that’s anyone’s fault but my own, I am just tired of “swimming” and never reaching shore.  Because that is where my healthy, happy life is; on the shore.  Unfortunately, I’m out here alone in the middle of the waves trying desperately to swim to shore. My healthy relationship is there, my college education is there, my career is there, and my own forgiveness is there; but I’m not.  You see, I’m swimming like mad, but I get so tired before I reach dry land, that I stop to rest and get pulled back out to sea.
This is my life with adult add; it will always be a struggle.

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  1. I suffered from anxiety attacks for over 30 years until I finally realized that the way to get out of an undertow is to let go and let it pull you under and eventually you will resurface. It sounds crazy, but it worked for me. When I felt the anxiety attacks coming on, I quit fighting and stayed with the present moment and observed the sensations.. It wasn’t easy because my natural inclination was to fight it. It took many months and many attacks, but gradually the anxiety subsided. I rarely get them now and when I do, they are short lived.

    Liked by 1 person

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